In a year before 2020, COVID-19 may have sounded like a new model from McLaren. Corona could’ve passed as a name for a niche car from Porsche, in case there are any niches they still need to plug.

Sadly, the reality behind those names is far less fun.

Self-isolation makes you ponder your life.

Motorsport withdrawal symptoms have set in aggressively. I tried to replace the need for speed by staging cat races across the tiles with two of those dangly toys, but it doesn’t scratch the itch as effectively as my kart, even if one cat is named Aston and the other named Bentley.

My third cat, Eau Rouge, was entirely disinterested, leaving me with a grid of only two competitors. Guess I’ll wait for karting.

In a week of limited highlights, the standout news was a general reduction in pollution and a small recovery of the environment. The only thing more beautiful than Venice is Venice with swans (and dolphins?!?) in the clear canals.

This got me thinking…

European governments, fueled by She-Who-Shall-Not-Be-Named of the teenage variety, are hell-bent on destroying the combustion engine to save the environment. To be clear, I am a lover of all things nature and I won’t miss 1.6 econoboxes spewing fumes into the air. My primary concern is sports cars being thrown out with the bathwater.

Coronavirus has demonstrated that people can work from home effectively. Practically the entire world is doing it right now. My first day of remote working was today and it was pure bliss.

My productivity went through the roof thanks to far fewer distractions than I normally have at the office. My stress went down because I wasn’t forced to wake up early to sit in traffic for 45 minutes. Best of all, I didn’t spend a cent on petrol.

Before you question whether I’ve lost my sanity entirely and renounced the car, hear me out.

I get absolutely no enjoyment driving my Fiat Bravo. It’s more fun than a 1.4 Polo, but that’s hardly a worthwhile benchmark for anything other than high insurance costs. Slogging it out through the traffic for 90 minutes a day is a pain.

It’s even worse taking it to the track and parking next to a real car. One day is one day…

In a world of proper remote working, there would be less traffic. Pollution would go down. Practical cars would become less important. Sports cars would rise to save humanity, one uneconomical V8 at a time.

If you’re only doing 300km a month, who cares about fuel consumption? Fill ‘er up!

I would only need the Honda S2000 and could sell the Bravo because I wouldn’t have to worry about putting 15,000kms a year on the car. Ok maybe not, since I’m also having a baby soon, but that’s a different challenge.

In similar vein to the return of wild animals to the canals of Venice, Polos would slowly leave our roads, being replaced by muscle cars and small roadsters. SUVs would still cast their shadows upon the world, but you can’t expect utopia.

We can only dream.

In a few weeks (hopefully), the world will return to the levels of normality that any sensible person would define as chaos. I’ll drive the Bravo to work and back, questioning why on earth we do this to ourselves as humans.

Or, just maybe, the world of remote working will start to take hold. Much like reducing your meat consumption, just a couple of days a week of remote working would be a gamechanger for stress levels AND the environment. Eat less meat, drive to work less often and enjoy sports cars forever.